Sometimes, when I don’t allow myself to think about what it would really mean in terms of time and cost and effort, I dream about going back to school to study literature. Of all the interests I’ve ever had, reading books is the one that has never flagged. I cannot remember any time in my life that I have not read books, nor any time where I wasn’t excited about reading books, where at some point in the day, when I looked toward evening, I didn’t get a little sparkly feeling when I thought about picking up my novel. The joy has not faded. It has only deepened.

The problem is that I want to read everything. Moreso, the problem is that I want to understand everything. As I age and have read more books, which means things become repetitive, I particularly want to read classics and literary fiction — stuff that goes deep, is different, that makes me think and feel and that might blow my mind.

When I read those books on my own, though, I know I miss a ton. I loved my literature classes in college because we had an instructor who knew the work. They knew its significance in its time and place, and to all the authors who followed. When the text was difficult, they helped untangle it. They highlighted key moments or beautiful passages. They pointed to the questions the work posed and then left to us to contemplate. And of course, when we talked about the books in class, everyone brought different perspectives, none of which were wrong, and all of which made me appreciate how amazing art is in what it evokes for us.

Our son is in his final year of college. He frequently texts us with book recommendations from his literature courses, his mind sparking with awe after reading and discussing in class. Beloved was one of those. As frequently, he talks about how much he loves reading these books under the tutelage of someone who knows them. The instructor helps the class see and appreciate what is happening beyond what they might have found on their own.

I don’t have literature courses to do this for me, but I have found something that is almost as good, and I am SO EXCITED about it. I’ve listened to the Book Riot podcast for years. I even applied for a job at Book Riot more than ten years ago, before I found the job I’m working at now. The hosts are fun and funny, and I love their sensibility about books. They’ve recently launched a new podcast called Zero to Well-Read that does everything I want except put me in a room with other people to talk about books. LAAAAA!

They started with The Great Gatsby, where they shared ideas I’d never thought of before, and which inspired me to read it again, then Their Eyes Were Watching God which taught me a lot about Zora Neale Hurston and which reminded me of how much I love that book. They talked about Thomas Pynchon’s Vineland, the inspiration for One Battle After Another that we’ll likely go see with our son this weekend. After listening to the episode I’m still not sure if I want to tackle the book, and this is one of the things I love about the show: they do the heavy lifting of reading the book to help you figure out if you want to read it yourself. They talked about Toni Morrison’s The Bluest Eye, which I’ve read at least twice and didn’t really get, but when they talked about it, it all clicked and I got it. In the most recent episode, they talked about Twilight, which I’ve never read and still don’t care to, and which they include because it is undoubtedly one of the biggest book events of our time. Its impact on the book industry, and particularly YA, cannot be overstated, and this piece is as fascinating to me as the episodes about the books I do want to read.

I cannot express how excited I get each time they release an episode. I listen to it the instant it hits my feed. I suffer through the ads to hear it as soon as it comes out even though if I waited a couple of days, I’d be able to listen ad-free when they release it to Patreon members. I’m a little bit giddy because a couple of weeks ago, after I finished my Mary Oliver book of poems, which I read a little in each morning, I decided I want to try some Shakespeare. I went out and bought Hamlet, and I read a couple of pages in the mornings or evenings. And what do you know, they’re going to be doing Hamlet soon on Zero to Well-Read. I can’t wait.